Mind Over Matter

My Honey often quotes one of his spiritual fathers saying, "It is easier to build a multi-million dollar building than to change one mind." And if you've ever tried to change the mind of a two year old, you know there is truth in that!

Our goal of living a simple life on Hacienda Hill has required a series of mind changing paradigms. You cannot live as you always lived, doing what you have always done and expect different results. I do believe that is also, one of the definitions of insanity. Regardless, we have made many a mind changing turns in our journey, some much more difficult than others but all for the best.  

The other day, while taking laundry off the line (one change for the better) my Honey said, "I STILL have too many clothes!" (Major change for the better) This man was a self-confessed clothes horse. After all these years together and multiple efforts on my part to pare down his excessive stash of clothing, he continued to require 8/10ths of our master closet to accommodate his clothing...and shoes...alone. What is wrong with this picture?!

He was supportive of our goal to live a more simple, greener lifestyle where less is more and encouraged me every step of the way. The day I tackled our closet was a day of reckoning for him. Okay, let me clarify that it took far more than A day to tackle our closet....days, intense days, many days, days of sweaty labor...you get the picture. We had added another shelf/rod down the longer wall of the closet years ago for his things. This meant he had that long wall rod, the end wall which had a double row of rods and over half of the original long wall rod. We had two hanging shoes racks, one almost to the floor (his) and a short one (mine) and a built-in shoe & storage shelf....most of which he had more of his shoes and/or folded clothes on. I might mention at this point hat he was constantly encroaching in on my little hanging shoe rack with his big old clodhoppers. In our chest of drawers, I had two small and one medium sized drawer. All the rest were his...the big drawers. The drawers on a beautiful cabinet I brought into the marriage were stuffed with his things as well. We will not talk about things piled about...mostly because we were both guilty of that and I AM talking about his clothes today...hehehe.

After a few days of just pulling things out of the closet, I tackled the task of deciding what went back in and where. I first culled the clothes I know I do not, will not or cannot wear. Then I culled the clothes I know he does not, will not or cannot wear. That was a much bigger task. Next, I determined where things would go back in the closet, that brought the decision NOT to use the shelf & rod we added in the first place. Without it, it once more became a walk-in closet. With it, no walking-in to be had!

I designated the short wall with double rods as the main clothes area. I assigned him 3/4 of it and I took the last 1/4. This was a shock to his system. The original long wall holds both hanging shoe racks, my dresses...all three of them remaining....with room for the chest of drawers to fit nicely under the rest of the rod. Viola! It was lovely!

I hung all his long sleeve shirts together in 1/4 the space, the short sleeve together in 1/4 the space and his pants on another 1/4. It was a beautiful sight. The rule for us now is that if it doesn't fit in the allocated space, it must go. He did, early on in this mind changing process, try to 'absorb' some of my 1/4 space for his overflow. His argument was that I wasn't using all of it....my prerogative, I insisted...and he had to weed out to fit in! It was painful at first but he got into the swing of of it and realized it wasn't so bad after all! He chose what stayed as long as it fit in it's appropriate space.

Now, he loves it! He has not missed the clothes that were culled and has, on his own I might add, filled two large trash bags of clothes to donate.Now you know why his proclamation of still having too many clothes was such a big deal. We estimated how many things he needed for work, how many 'good' shirts, etc, and shed everything else. We have a continuous bag of 'Things to Take Away' and add to it as we go.

We still have to work our way through the chest of drawers and the shelf in the closet but the radical changes required a little adjustment time, so I have put off all that for now. I make regular checks on the closet to make sure it is staying neat and tidy with things in their places. The top of the chest was zoned 'stuff free' and remains so. That, in and of itself is a miracle! Life at Hacienda Hill is getting more simple and green all the time and we love it. Room by room, drawer by drawer we are freeing ourselves of the that which bogs us down.

The smell of clothes dried on the line is fresh and renewing. The act of hanging them is relaxing to me and my Honey helps me bring them in. We reap the benefits of seeking that simple life every day and look forward to each step of the journey. 

What You Need to Know about What You Want

I am a huge fan of down-sizing and 'living smaller'. In fact, I have drawn up a concept house design that I hope to build one day and create a whole neighborhood for those that choose to live smaller. Bring back the day when neighbors were known and life was shared, a simpler time when walking down the sidewalk was a sensory experience because you could smell dinner cooking in your neighbor's house. Quaint little houses that hug their occupants in cozy comfort rather than multiple rooms laying empty and life-less most of the time. That's the idea behind my concept houses for those ready to embrace living smaller, adults - whose children are grown and gone - living in an old fashioned neighborhood in independent and private space of their own.

My Honey and I have 1321 square feet in our home, not large by most standards but it is larger than we really need for the two of us. Notice I used the word 'need' as opposed to 'want'. Maybe you want a larger house, that's your prerogative. My goal is to continue to down-size until we find the perfect space for us.

However, for me, living a simple and smaller life means smaller square footage, not less quality of life. It also means smaller volume of possessions to have to house, so less square footage is required. Less footage means less space to heat and cool. Less floor space to mop, less products required to keep clean. Less stress and money to maintain. When the excess and extraneous is gone there is need only to house the important and cherished. I like the way that sounds! My concept houses are designed for that lifestyle. 

I research and read about people already living this lifestyle to learn what they do, what works or doesn't work for them, what they would change to make things better. Almost every one of them report a better quality of life when there is less quantity of stuff and space to maintain. Their discover more free time to devote to friends and family, more energy for the things they want to do rather than every spare moment used to 'keep house and yard work ' caught up. The common element each and every one has mentioned is taking these steps after coming to terms with 'need' over 'want'. A change in their way of thinking and prioritizing brought them all to the same conclusion.....living smaller really allows them to experience 'life' in their lives. I like the way that sounds, too!

So, Friends, I will keep you posted on the things we discover and change to bring more quality of life to our home on Hacienda Hill.

Here's the Key

Yesterday I completed a project I have long wanted done, having anticipated the rewards of said completed project. Our home is chocked full of unfinished projects. Typically, I am willing to wait on completion if it means I can get it done the way I really want without having to settle for less than the desired end result. I put a lot of thought and planning into projects so that makes the waiting more palatable.

For me, it is genuine pleasure and satisfaction to see something completed. I have not stopped smiling all day because of the joy I feel over the simple task completion. Maybe that's the key...joy in the simple things like a finished project.

The project in question is the drapes in our living room. I planned, shopped to find and purchase the fabrics two years ago to achieve the look I wanted. A nasty hand injury and resulting surgeries impeded my progress for nearly a year spent in casts or braces. Not to be completely shot out of the water, I asked a friend over to help me cut the fabric when I was still in a cast. Slowly over time, I pieced the panels together. Then, all the sewing last month. Yesterday, I recovered the cornice boards and my Honey hung them back up for me when he got home. I could not have been more thrilled.

There is a lot of satisfaction in planning and completing something you created. It would have been a lot easier to buy new curtains and that certainly would not have taken two years either. For me, creating something beautiful for my home and family with my own hands says, "I love you." That's how I really feel when I make things comfortable, beautiful or cook a good healthy meal. I think that is also part of living the simple life. I can look around our home and see things and projects we have done ourselves. They are not perfect, don't claim to be but it is the love and sweat we put into it that makes it uniquely ours. It is surrounding ourselves with tangible, functional products birthed of our love for one another and our home. It is what makes living the simple life on Hacienda Hill worth coming home to. It is definitely worth the effort....and the wait. 

Day 47 - We See Not, Therefore We Want Not

As part of de-cluttering our lives we need to self-monitor the things we allow to entice and tease us via our email In-box. As a blogger, I read other people's blogs and subscribe to them if I find they interest me. Same goes for 'newsletters' from different entities. I get one from HGTV, I had a couple of gardening newsletters, I get a few from different ministries, etc.

We all get these from time to time but it can be a time thief and trickster to entice if we are not careful. I say this because I just deleted an email and 'unsubscribed' from a business which  I previously made some purchases. Now, I get a catalog in the mail and daily emails from them. I peruse the catalog and "oohhh and ahhh" over all the things that tickle my eyes. The 'crafter' in me sees things I like and starts to ponder ways to duplicate it in a more economical way because I have neither the expendable cash nor the inclination to pay the big bucks for them. The email I deleted informed me I could get free shipping if I ordered over $125 worth of stuff today! That's what I need...more stuff!! NOT!

So, from time to time, we need to de-clutter 'time-wasters and spend-enticers' from our In-box. If you receive a regular email from a business or newsletter (we are NOT talking about the emails you get from me - LOL) and you know you are not going to read it because there are 15 of them still unread, then unsubscribe from it. It only takes a click of the mouse and you no longer have to feel guilty about saying to yourself yet again...I'll read that later. No you won't, you know you won't. You intend to but you won't.

I've tried all the organizational tricks of creating folders to move them to for future reading and then I either don't move them or they go gather cobwebs in that folder. I've learned the simplicity and gratification of unsubscribing. I do have folders for the blogs I read that I love, have learned from and want to reference later. I use those regularly but that number is few. The rest go away. So does the guilt of seeing them unread as if they were taunting me. I do not need that and neither do you. Remember, we are on a quest to simply our lives and control our environment rather than have it control us. Chances are, if we do not have the time or desire to read something now, we will not have the time or desire to read it later either.

Simple Life is all about prioritizing that which has or adds value to our life and shedding everything else. We can more fully appreciate what we have when we are not always being tempted by those entering our private world via our in-box to buy more, spend more. We see not, therefore we want not...we can only be content when we refuse to let 'stuff' be important. There will always be more stuff out there.....let it stay there. 

Simple Life > Material Life

For those of us that have been out of school a along time, the title line reads: Simple Life (> greater than) Material Life. I've said it before but it bears repeating, living a simple life does not mean you are forced into an austere lifestyle with little to no luxuries or comforts; it means you pare away the things around you that drain your energy while generating no joy or pleasure in your life. Anything that takes up space and energy without functioning in your day-to-day world or putting a smile on your face and a song in your heart is excess. That's the stuff you purge, not that which fills your life richly.

For the entire 8 1/2 years we have lived in this place, we have groaned about not having enough storage. We do not have a garage, so no extra storage to be had there. We basically have been reduced to two closets, a partial closet and the 5' X 5' area in the master bath taken up with a huge corner tub no one uses. It takes too much water to fill and I'm tired of the bath before that happens anyway! I use it for storage...how sad. Oh, there is that leaky old storage building in the back yard but you can't put anything you really want to keep out there....nature has claimed squatter's rights. So, as you can see, storage is a real issue for us.

Then it hit me, if we need to 'store' something are we really using it? I know Christmas decorations need somewhere to go but how many of us have boxes of 'stuff', drawers that can't hold another rubber band or closets we stand in front of dreading to open the door? Case in point....we have three junk drawers in the kitchen....why? Because we obviously have too much junk! I have a fair idea what is contained within each drawer but three?? Really?? The name alone, JUNK DRAWER, should be an indicator of how important that stuff is...or isn't, as the case may be. I cannot think of one thing in either of those three drawers that make me smile. Oh, the array of miscellaneous screws and nuts has come in handy from time to time but they do not need to live in the kitchen. I do use rubber bands when I'm harvesting herbs but I don't need three drawers for those. I had a large box of artificial flowers taking up space in the master closet. To say it was the only closet big enough to hold the box should have been an indicator of how much space was being sucked up by artificial flowers I did not use! I tossed it a few years ago but it makes my point. We tend to hang on to things that suck energy and space from our lives and offer nothing in return, no joy, no song in the heart...

On my desk sits a beautiful cobalt blue goblet my Honey bought one anniversary several years ago. I love the dark blue goblets and they do make me smile. I use one everyday from which to drink water. I am NOT a good water drinker. I do not get thirsty often so I do not think about it. I know I need to drink water so I started using the blue goblets as my official water glass. Our other glasses are clear glass and when filled with clear water....nothing to grab my attention. The cobalt blue, however, catches my eye, I smile, I drink.

Our home is bathed in color, it's everywhere because color, to me, is life. My heart is happy when surrounded with color. Even in our colorful home, stuff can distract and overwhelm to the point of not being able to appreciate the colors I love so much in the first place. I think each of need a space to call our own, a refuge to which we shut the door to the world and find comfort, solace and peace. This place should be our homes! As the slow process of eliminating, paring down and carving out a home of harmony and peace evolves, we get one step closer with each purposed decision to get rid of the things we do not love or use enough to take up space or energy in our soon to be oasis of tranquility. Each load to Goodwill or an item donated to someone that actually needs it is a step toward a simple life filled with only the truly functional and loved items with which we choose to share our space. I'm going to hold myself accountable to not allowing anything less to enter in our sanctuary. I'll toast to that...with my lovely blue goblet and a smile on my face!

Day 43 - **SIGH**

Sometimes in my quest for the Simple Life I feel I am making leaps and bounds....not so today. It feels more like two steps forward and three steps back. If you recall, a few days ago I was excited about my new found realization about breakfast with Nina, the puppy. I made the adjustments needed to accomodate her need to see me as she eats and made it work for me in a positive way. That was a good thing.

Then last night I had to go out and by pet food. We have four indoor dogs and nine outside feral cats (three adults and six food-eating sized kittens, none of which we can touch)...that's a lot of pet food! I called my Honey while I was at the store to see if we needed more doggy treats. We have them trained to go to bed (their kennels) at 8pm and we give each a treat when they happily rush to the bed. Here's the thing....the four dogs each get a different treat based on their size, age and preference. Chelsie gets the large, hard doggie cookies. She loves them, the little ones struggle with those. Pan Dulce gets the meat flavored little bone-shaped biscuits. Nikos prefers the marrow-filled treats and the baby, Nina gets the softer chicken flavored strips we use in training. Four different treat varieties. Then there is the actual dog food. Until we weighted Nikos last week, all of the older dogs ate the same food. Nikos is a little too heavy, so we have now put him on a diet, he gets the Healthy Weight version. The puppy Nina is still on the super-duper nutritional puppy food. The cats all get the same food we now have to buy in the extra large bag. They do not get treats. As I loaded all this into my cart, the big picture started to emerge.

Then came this mornings feeding time. Pre-kennel release, I prepared Nina's puppy food dish in her room and set Nikos' new weight control food in a dish in his new eating area apart form the others. This required the arrangement of baby gates for separation and blocking in. EGAD! For all my cleverness in the new arrangements, I totally freaked the dogs out because they usually rush from their indoor kennels out to potty. I had blocked them in with the gates! So much for planning ahead. They were confused and bounced all over the place. If it were not so annoying, it might have been amusing but dogs and Mommy alike were starting to feel a little stressed.

Finally got everyone where they were supposed to be and sat down to have my breakfast with Nina again. She did not want to eat. Fine! I finished my food and headed back to the kitchen where Nikos was sequestered with his new food. He did not want to eat either, this was just too new and unnerving for him. FINE!! To no surprise, Chelsie and Pan Dulce were on a food strike as well. FINE!! Mommy does not seem to be handling this as well as she perhaps could.

On to feed the cats. I take a large container of food out for the crowd and the kittens dash about as if I was Jack the Kitty Ripper...this is an everyday - twice a day - event, you might think they would get used to the person that supplies their every need, but NOOOO, they run like their tails were on fire. Run, you little ingrates, run!! I didn't want to pet you anyway! Who needs your love? Not me!.....That's a  total lie, I want to love on them so badly my finger ache!

Nothing 'simple' about any of this. I realize we are to blame for this situation and it will be up to us...and when I say 'us' I know it means 'me'...to straighten it out. Pets are supposed to enhance and enrich our lives, not make them crazy. Our pets are animals tho we treat them as if they were four-legged kids. All we require from them is unconditional love and simple obedience. The love they freely give, the obedience we had to work on.

I will give some thought to finding a better, more streamline system to give each one that which bests suits their needs but not right now. For now, I am focusing on regaining a sense of calm, order and clear-mindedness. All the baby gates are down but the one that keeps Nina in the house while allowing the others access to the doggy door. The buzzer just went off reminding me it is time to hang a load of clothes out on the line. That's good for soothing the savage beast within. It also helps remind me that I am, indeed, making a little progress in living the simple life on Hacienda Hill. Today, I need every bit of encouragement I can scrape up.**sigh**

 

 

Day 41 - It's the Little Things

I had an exciting moment this morning when I realized I had incorporated a 'Simple Life' principle into my life without having to even think about it. That means my mind and subconscious are actually absorbing and utilizing the Simple Life mentality on its own....this is a good thing!

This came about in the care and nurturing of our new puppy, Nina. All of our canine critters have their own 'kennel' in which they sleep. Usually, my morning starts well before theirs, so I have to stop writing to let them all out when they wake up and announce it is time. Since baby Nina struggles with abandonment issues as a result of her orphan time alone in the wilderness, I have been sitting with her as she eats every morning. She has to see me. Typically, I have not been so excited about this because my mind is on my unattended work waiting at the computer.

This morning, like every morning, I prepared her food and water before letting her out. I also filled a coffee cup and prepared a bowl of hot steel-cut oats I had cooked overnight and took them into her 'room' prior to releasing the hounds. Nina and I had breakfast together! This turned a frustration into a time of enjoyment. She was happy and I was happy rather than frustrated. A win-win deal.

As I sat with bowl and coffee cup in hand watching her eat, I marveled at the changes in her little body. You can still see a faint outline of her ribs as she breathes but her hips joints are no longer protruding and she has blossomed into a content little girl puppy where she was once scared, starved and confused.

My quest for a simple life where I control my environment rather than it controlling me also means taking the time to enjoy simple pleasures, like breakfast with a puppy, over the demands of a self-imposed work schedule. I did not plan it, it just evolved on its own but it filled me with excitement to realize what had happened. Yes, I know...I amuse easily but isn't that also a giant step forward in living a simple life on Hacienda Hill? I hope so!

Day 40 - Something New from Somthing Old

Life back here at home rolled on without me over the weekend while I was out of town for a family funeral. My Honey was able to be home with the newest and youngest family member, Nina, the 12 week old (according to vet) Chihuahua puppy he rescued from the creek and highway last Thursday. It was good for both of them. Her starved little body is filling out and you can barely see her ribs and joints now. Her eyes are clear and she no longer looks incredibly sad. The ant bites are healing and soon she shall be her pretty little self without the ravages of life on her own taking it's toll. As I write this she is in a warm doggy bed right beside my desk chair playing with her toy pink wiener dog. She is like a little shadow that makes every move I make. As long as she can be by me, she is fine and content but the time she spent in the wilderness alone has taken a toll; she was out alone during the time Hurricane Hermine came blowing through here. As her memories of that fearful time fade, I'm sure she will grown in confidence.

Today I am ready to get back to my mission of minimizing the material things that seem to have taken over our home and life. I'd like to take this time to say again that reducing clutter and possessions does not mean you get rid of everything near and dear to you. It simply means you get rid of everything that is not near and dear to you or that you do not really use in day-to-day life. Here's the criteria I use...if it does not bring a smile to my face when I look at it, I do not love it and/or I have not used it within the last year, it is gone! If I have more of any one thing than I can reasonable use, I pare down to the essentials. Who needs 7 spatulas when they only have 2 hands anyway? I finally threw away the old rusty metal spatula I have had longer than my sons...they are 30 now! 'Nuff said.

Re-purposing items can bring back life and functionality, as well. For instance, I had an antique 'gentleman's' chest of drawers that has resided in what is now 'my room' AKA the guest room for years. This is the room where I display all my treasures from various mission trips and it has something of an exotic feel to it. I have mosquito netting hung from the ceiling over the bed, the colors are warm and earthy. The room just flat out makes me feel good when in I am in there. It has a memory foam mattress on the bed that is good for my achy joints, thus the claim of 'my room'. A good friend recently gave me an antique wardrobe, which would make its home in that room. I had a couple of pieces too many to bring in the new piece so I had to make choices and decisions per the rule: Bring something new in, something old has to go! I gave the old wardrobe in the room with which I was not emotionally attached to a friend that needed it for storage. She was happy to get it! I took that gentleman's chest and cut it in half, making two night stands out of it. One for the master bedroom and one for 'my room'. Having re-purposed the chest, I now have furniture that serves us well from one that no longer met our needs. Love it more now that it is better utilized. And, the new wardrobe is making itself useful while adding to the wonderful atmosphere of the room. That is what motivates me, making the most of what I have and love while eliminating that which no longer brings joy. (Things I love ((minus -)) things I don't love) + less clutter to clean (you cannot organize clutter) = Simple Life on Hacienda Hill. Ahhhh.....  

Day 33 - Rain, Rain has Come My Way

Ah, another long holiday weekend behind us and life returns to normal...normal being relative and none of my relatives being normal...what are you gonna do?

This is Day 33 of chronicling our transition to the simple life here at Hacienda Hill. I can say with all sincerity that I know we are on the right path. It felt a bit overwhelming in the beginning to list all the things we needed to address and changes we need to make. Now, I've de-cluttered my mind and let go of the unhealthy habit of creating stress on myself with those stinkin' lists! Today, I take each day as it comes and look for something I can change for the better. Even if I only accomplish one change, it is one less change to face and I relish the sense of progress. If I have a day where nothing is changed, nothing is de-cluttered or pared down or nothing is simplified..that's ok, too! Living a simple life means controlling our environment instead of it controlling us...my attitude has changed allowing me to accept days graciously that appear not to be productive. That, in and of itself, my Friends, is progress!! See how far I've come?!

Things I have changed.....I bought a really cool and exceedingly sharp ceramic knife. The beauty of this is that this one knife replaced nearly every other knife we possess. I had many! I kept a set of steak knives in case I ever have guest for dinner but my second set of steak knives and every other knife in the house..gone! I'm so excited I can hardly stand it. One knife instead of the knife block sitting on the counter and a drawer full of the other sets! WOW! This is minimizing at its best.

Today is Tuesday after a three day weekend, so it's technically Monday...Monday at the hacienda is linen washing day. Yep, bed sheets and towels are washed and hung on the line...typically. Not today, not this Tuesday/Monday because of  that little hurricane that blew into northern Mexico and was gracious enough to bring much needed rain our way. Rainy days and wash days do not go well together when you hang clothes on the line. This is my first wet wash day since I converted to outdoor drying. I'm not stressed over it at all. Didn't even take the sheets off the bed or gather towels. It will be dry and hot again all too soon. We go to bed clean, so that's not a biggie and there are plenty more towels to be had. With my new and improved attitude, I am simply enjoying the rain with no concern over my thwarted wash day. "Circumstances will not control my life"...repeat after me!

Day 27 - Clutter, Clutter, Go Away!

You know, the more I venture into the simple life, even if a lot of it is still something we are working toward, the more enamored I am with it. Lately I have had a lot going on, nothing new there, but it has given me even more appreciation for the 'simple life' we have incorporated and a stronger desire to continue on that path.

As much as it entails shedding the excess in our home and world, it is a change in mindset more than anything. Admittedly, my mind is changing faster than my house is being emptied. SOOOOO much stuff yet to go away. In that vein, I bought a new knife last night so I have to get rid of old ones. It's a great trade-off for me! New knife is awesome, old ones...not so much. In fact, I think I will get rid of many knives. I have far too many...how many can I use at one time, anyway?

My Honey has really surprised me with his initiative in shedding clothes. As in getting rid of excess...silly, dirty minds, LOL . He had far too many, most he never wore and he is always contributing to the full bags he has already gathered. I'm impressed. Once the concept sunk in, he became an eager partner. Now if he can grasp the idea of shutting a dresser drawer till it actually closes.....

Clutter can be mental just as much as it is literal stuff. I have shed a lot of mental clutter. There is a lot more to go but it is a process, one about which we need stay diligent. I tell myself that every day. I'm trying to get where I edit thoughts that do not pertain to the most important of issues in my life. I need a more concentrated focus on my writing and letting random, extraneous thoughts occupy my mind is detrimental to my work. However, you must have a clear outline of what the most important issues in your life are. I found a lot of mental clutter came from issues that should not have been on my radar if I were consistently editing and monitoring that which I give time, thought and energy.

Think about that and see if you are expending too much of yourself on issues that are not priorities you have chosen. Shake those other things loose! Let's make a plan to come up with five things (stuff) we get rid of and five things (mental clutter) we shake out of our minds over the long Labor Day weekend. Let me know how you do!!